Example # 3 - Pirates


In my book Masturbation will make you Blind and Crippled there is a chapter about how the legends of peg leg pirates was based on the fact that masturbation effects include causing a person to walk as if they have a peg leg.

It has been mentioned that there are other reasons for the same body damaging effects to the body caused by masturbation. Snorting drugs, Injecting Drugs, or strong physical exertion can all cause many of the same symptoms caused by masturbation.

The photo above is being presented to show that other people with no idea what I talk about, or any connection to me at all, can have the same kinds of insight that have allowed me to create the Happeh Theory of masturbation damage to the body.

The subject of the picture is some anonymous female at a part somewhere in the world. Whoever saw this picture was inspired to create a pirate from her. She has an eyepatch on the right eye, a parrot on her right shoulder, a pirate hat, and most obviously, she has a wooden peg leg on the left. Happeh Theory predicts masturbation damage to the body will cause a person to go blind in one eye. One leg will be damaged and behave as if it a peg.

I think that any curious person would wonder what factors could cause this women to assume such an odd pose. She is not doing it on purpose. When she puts pressure on her body it reacts by assuming that pose. If she was a man, that pose would be exactly how a man masturbating with his right hand would look like. The head curls forward, the leg opposite the masturbating hand rises upwards, the entire head contracts while the mouth forms a rictus grin. You will see that same rictus grin in the faces of AIDS patients for the same basic reason of body mechanics.

I do not know if this woman's symptoms are due to masturbation. Her large size as well as her distorted posture obcure the signs I look for.
- posted by Happeh @ 1:09 PM 0 comments

 
Example #2


This example is a very good one. I think that most people's first impression of this picture would be that there was something wrong with the standing man. Without even considering masturbation, this man looks like he has problems.

We start with the standard assumption that he is right handed and masturbates with his right hand. If the photo is examined, we see that his head is leaning to the right. This is described as one of the usual symptoms of masturbation in my book Masturbation will make you Blind and Crippled

The man's mouth is wide open. That is an odd thing. The motivation could be that he is exhuberant and has his mouth open to yell like the man he is carrying. Look at the mouth. Doesn't it have a strange look to the way it is open? The man being carried is excited with his mouth open. It looks normal. We see his teeth and his tongue. The standing man's mouth is wide open so that it looks like he is opening it from the back of his throat. We can see the back of his tongue and almost see his tonsils.

My claim is that his mouth is open wide like that because of the damage to his body. The stress of carrying the man with his weakened body forces his mouth to open wide in an involuntary way. He is not opening his mouth that wide by conscious choice. As if he said "I will open my mouth so wide to show my tonsils to people". The tongue is protruding out of the mouth. The tongue looks as if it is pointing to the right

The most obvious symptom in this picture is the one that caused me to save this picture. The effect is so obvious as to be undeniable to even the beginner who is reading this column for the first time. A person who is not quite sure if they should believe all of this or not.

If you look at the standing man's right eye, it looks white. It almost looks as if the eye is not their. As if the man is a cyclops. (See "Cyclops legend derived from homosexual people). The eye socket is smallish and the pupil is rolled back into the man's head. This is a completely involuntary action. This man did not say to himself, " I will roll my eye back up into my head". The eye rolled upwards because of the damaging effects of masturbation.

The tilted head, the wide open mouth, and the eye rolled back in the head are all caused by the same problem. Masturbation with the right hand has caused shrinkage to the right side of the head of the man. This shrinkage tightens the muscles of the head on the right side. Under stress, the tight muscles will contract first, causing the head tilt to the right. The tight muscles also cause the mouth to be pulled wide open and to pull the eye up into the head.

DO NOT FORGET! - Happeh theory says that there are other causes for the same symptoms caused by masturbation. Injecting drugs, strong physical exertion, or snorting drugs can cause all or some of the same symptoms. There is a small chance that this example or any other example is cause by drugs or physical exertion instead of masturbation.
- posted by Happeh @ 12:17 PM 2 comments